just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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