that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
