i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
we're chasing vodka with high fives
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
