if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize
