Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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