oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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