dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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