Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
