so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
