Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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