I showed him my bush... on skype.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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