I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
i need some magic done to my vagina
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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