Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
