then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
