This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
He has the fingertips of a God
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
