FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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