Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
two words...techno handjob
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize