Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Randomize
