And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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