best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
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