Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
