Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
