Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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