The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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