Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
