I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
