Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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