so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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