i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Randomize