So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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