turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Randomize
