I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
