Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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