I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
