I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
