In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
