You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Randomize
