Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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