you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
