Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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