You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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