I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
