Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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