after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
