How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
