i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
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