sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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