you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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