last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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