ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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