Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
